1. ISBN13: 9780440508830
2. Condition: NEW
3. Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.

Customer Review :

Mandatory Reading

This book is mandatory reading for everyone. Period. Yes, it's subject matter is confronting and one we'd all rather not have to deal with. But the reality is exactly the opposite. EVERY single person on the planet will be affected by violence at some point in their life. If not themselves, someone they work with or live with or care about. What is so incredible about this book is that whilst the subject matter is about violence, it really is actually a manual of discovering more abilities we possess as human beings that we never knew we had!! This book was like someone telling me I had an extra set of arms at my disposal that I was blindly unaware of! This book is about being more human and ironically it sits proudly on the same shelf as any of my best personal development books i own.

I grew as a person by reading this book. I have shared this with family and friends and they too have told of how it has transformed them for the better.

If you have never read this book then please just do it now. It is guaranteed to radically change the way you see yourself, the world and everyone else in it; sometimes for a little worse .. but ultimately for the best.

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A book EVERY woman must read!!!

A read this book when it first came out and loved it. I learned so much about myself, to listen to my insticts and to not walk around in fear. I reread parts of this book often just to remind myself of insticts. Now that it is on the Kindle, that will be even easier. READ it and give it to a friend. It could save your life!!

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The Gift of Fear

An Excellent book that everyone should read! There is something in it for all. Every person can relate to this book in some manner of their lives, be it in a personal relationship, tragedy, or work related. I was recommended this book by a long lost friend that I became reacquainted with after a decade of abuse. After reading this heart touching book on a personal note, I found that what I went through could have been prevented if I would have read this several years ago and learned the survival information this book has taught me. I no longer call it a book, I call it a guide. Thank you to Gavin DeBecker for taking your knowledge and putting it out there for the rest of the world to read and learn from. And thank you to that friend who recommended me to read...you changed my life!

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This book will save lives

The Gift of Fear: Survival Signals that Protect us from Violence is a groundbreaking book that will remain a classic among books on this subject. Having first read this book in 1997 I find that 13 years later I still refer back to this book regularly and recommend it in almost every safety and survival training class that I instruct. Gavin de Becker is the nation's leading expert on predicting violent behavior and he continues to lead the way in his field of study.

The beauty of the Gift of Fear is that we all have "intuition" and "gut feelings", it is what we do with these feeling that can determine whether the outcome is tragic or uneventful. The book teaches you to never ignore such feelings and that our intuition is an early warning sign that something IS wrong. Human beings are the only creature on the planet that will ignore this sense and oftentimes it leads to tragic outcomes. The beauty is that you don't need to buy a gadget to tap into this resource...you are born with it and all you have to do is listen to it and acknowledge it. Our world is filled with signals of danger yet many, if not most, people go about their business with a complete lack of situational awareness. Oftentimes these people present themselves as optimal targets by looking down at the ground when they walk, shoulders slumped, avoiding eye contact, etc. We have people completely oblivious who are walking around listening to their MP3 player, iPod, or talking on their cell phones. All of these distractions make such individuals inviting targets for the predators in society. Having situational awareness to know what is going on in your environment allows your intuition to provide you an early warning signal that something is wrong which in turn allows you to acknowledge the feeling and then ACT accordingly. The Gift of Fear will provide you will the necessary information to act accordingly. Buy this book, read it and then make your loved ones read it! Yes, it is that valuable.


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Helpful insights into intuition, but...

This book is very insightful into how intuition works, and encourages the reader to listen to her or his intuition, with which I totally agree. The book was very informative in that respect, and for the most part, an entertaining read. However, after most of the case histories, I couldn't help but think, "...but then what do you do?" Although the author espouses an anti-gun viewpoint, the many examples of intuition working to warn of true danger actually prompted me to think that having a weapon might be a very good thing in those instances. Yes, recognizing intuitively that you are in mortal danger is helpful, but it doesn't eliminate the danger itself. You are still left to deal with the danger if you are already in a situation in which it can't be avoided. He did offer some advice, such as it's better to approach someone for help rather than wait for someone to offer it, but there weren't as many suggestions as in some other books. He recommends a certain self-defense course, but honestly, most women are simply no match for a man who has no inhibitions about harming another person. Granted, on some occasions intuition can help avoid getting into a dangerous situation in the first place. That we tend to try to explain away our intuition with so-called logic is also a valid and valuable point, and one of the highlights of the book. To penalize the author for lack of a magic defense would be unfair, so I'm rating the book at 4 stars, although the message that intuitively recognizing danger somehow almost solves the problem was a little frustrating after awhile.

The self-promotion mentioned in several other reviews really didn't bother me; his security business experience is one of the reasons he is considered an expert in the field. However, his anti-gun pitch at the end seemed contradictory after so many tales of extreme danger. Gun ownership carries many responsibilities and should not be taken lightly, or by some at all, but to recommend that citizens get rid of their guns just didn't click after reading the rest of the book. The harrowing tales made me want to go buy one and learn how to use it.

I also had mixed feelings about the advice to turn off the news and basically stop worrying about danger because your intuition will be all the warning you'll need. Sounded a little like pie in the sky. Not that constant worrying is a good thing, but as in one case mentioned, if I had to go to my car alone every night in a large deserted parking lot, I would find it hard to put the possibliity of danger out of my conscious mind, too, even if I had a basic problem with living in LA. Perhaps a fine line separates wariness and worrying.

The book is still definitely worth reading and has good chapters on subjects such as stalking.

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1. ISBN13: 9780425191651
2. Condition: NEW
3. Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.
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Editorial Review :

"He doesn't mean to hurt me-he just loses control."
"He can be sweet and gentle."
"He's scared me a few times, but he never hurts the children-he's a great father."
"He's had a really hard life..."

Women in abusive relationships tell themselves these things every day. Now they can see inside the minds of angry and controlling men-and change their own lives. In this groundbreaking book, a counselor shows how to improve, survive, or leave an abusive relationship, with:

€ The early warning signs
€ Nine abusive personality types
€ How to tell if an abuser can change, is changing, or ever will
€ The role of drugs and alcohol
€ What can be fixed, and what can't
€ How to leave a relationship safely

Customer Review :

Absolutely essential reading for the abused

This is the best book I have ever read on this subject ! So easy to read and to the point! I have read it over and over again and have dog-eared just about every page. Please read if you are in any kind of an abusive situation - it will help tremendously and give you hope for a better tomorrow. God bless you.

Rating :

spot on

I should preface by calling myself the female victim. I hesitated to read a book on this subject as I didn't want to get into man bashing, I just wanted to understand what was going on and Lundy Bancroft fulfils this. He describes the situation clearly but he pulls no punches, he's spot on with every situation, unfortunately for me and my husband I can now see many more things wrong with our relationship. I can't believe I've been so blind to allow this to happen. I now have a big job ahead of me for which I'll be referring to this book.

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PLEASE READ IF U ARE A VICTIM OR EVEN IF U ARGUE ALOT!

This book is so on point that it is almost unnerving to read! I read a passage to my mother who immediately spotted her ex husband's tactics. I myself am taking this book one day at a time to guide me through the issues at home. Please read or pass on to someone who may need it. It could possibly save a life!

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A must-read

I am just coming out of an abusive relationship. When I started reading this book, I found myself thinking, "Oh my gosh! This is my life!" This book helped me so much in understanding that: "yes, I was in an abusive relationship" and that "yes, I was right to get out." It's really hard to leave someone who is abusive. If your partner was a jerk all the time, then it would be easy, but that's not how it is. You can go days, weeks, or even months without an incident. Then when something does happen, they might twist the situation around and make you think that it was your fault, that if you had only done something different, this never would have happened. Reading this book helped me see the manipulations and the games that my husband used to control me and to keep me in the relationship. The book made it so much easier to stay out of the relationship and not to have so many second thoughts about leaving. This book really helped me understand why he did the things he did. I would recommend this book for anyone who is (or has been) in an abusive relationship. I would also recommend this book for anyone who counsels people that have been in abusive relationships or who counsels people that have been accused of being abusive. This is an excellent book.

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Best Book on Abuse!

This is a great, and easily read and understood book on abuse. Thanks for sharing the info from this book with the rest of us. As a psychology student, this gave me the BEST understanding of abuse I could get my hands on.

Thanks again.... Sheryl
ps, a must read for every DV counselor!

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1. ISBN13: 9780465087303
2. Condition: NEW
3. Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.
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Editorial Review :

When Judith Herman's Trauma and Recovery was first published five years ago, it was hailed as a groundbreaking work. In the intervening years, Herman's now classic volume has changed the way we think about and treat traumatic events and trauma victims. In a new introduction, Herman chronicles the incredible response the book has elicited and explains how the issues surrounding the topic of trauma and recovery have shifted within the clinical community and the culture at large. Trauma and Recovery brings a new level of understanding to a set of problems usually considered individually. Herman draws on her own cutting-edge research on domestic violence, as well as on a vast literature of combat veterans and victims of political terror, to show the parallels between private terrors such as rape and public traumas such as terrorism. The book puts individual experience in a broader political frame, arguing that psychological trauma can be understood only in a social context. Meticulously documented and frequently using the victims own words as well as those from classic literary works and prison diaries, Trauma and Recovery is a powerful work that will continue to profoundly impact our thinking.

Customer Review :

Great Purchase

This Seller provides fast professional service. The book arrived well packaged and in perfect condition. I would definitely purchase again from this vendor.

Rating :

Best Book on Trauma and PTSD

Years ago I went to work for a residential treatment center for adolescent girls. Unfortunately well over 90% of the residents had been sexually abused and my graduate school training had only provided me the very rudiments of working with that issue. That was before the days of the internet and Amazon.com but I got lucky and found this book. It allowed me to be a more skilled and knowledgeable practitioner.

Today I am out of direct treatment and teach, and one of the classes I teach is Working with Military (which by the way is a subject without a textbook) that of course deals with PTSD. But, I still go to my copy of the first edition of this book I purchased years ago since it is not only a great source of information it is a great reference background and contains many many other useful references to past ground breaking research. It is a classic in the field.

I would hope that Dr. Herman would herself update this book or designate someone to work with her to do so.

Is it the best source for current developments? No. Is it the best source for a background and deep understanding of trauma and recovery? Yes.

Rating :

helps understand the mechanisms of trauma

This book was the most detailed book I've ever seen on trauma. I had spent 20 years in cults and have been affected from various forms of abuse and manipulation. It doesn't matter what form the trauma took. In my case I had complex PTSD, but this is a great book that describes the things necessary for recovery. For my case, since I had a few addictions, I had found a "safe" group as described in the book, then I could work through my trauma. In my case the "safe" place for me was a large "SLAA" meeting with both men and women. This book is very helpful and detailed.

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trauma and recovery

I am not sure if I missed the point here. This book was recommended by a Psychiatrist to help me understand P.T.S.D. I really did not learn anything I did not know.


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Great and Reliable

This item arrived in the condition the seller said it would. Fast and reliable service. Very Pleased.

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1. ISBN13: 9781568386218
2. Condition: NEW
3. Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.
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Editorial Review :

This breakthrough work, the first to describe sexual addiction, is still the standard for recognizing and overcoming this destructive behavior. With insight and sensitivity, Dr. Patrick Carnes outlines how to identify a sexual addict, recognize the way others may unwittingly become complicit or codependent, and change the patterns that support the addiction.

Customer Review :

Very informitive

This book really was packed with information on a topic that is not really discussed much in our culture and yet is an extremely serious problem. I hope more people read this book so they understand the dynamics and cycles of addiciton. Until there is more unstandanding, this disorder will not be recognized as a true disease that has roots in family dsyfunction and trauma.

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A GOOD READ.

This is a good read for those wanting to get a better understanding of why or how, someone can do something that we would consider sexually inappropriate, to say the least. It's also insightful for those that are co addict; living with someone how is an addict, whether that is to sex, drug, food, or anything else.

Rating :

Out of the Shadows

This book gives you an important understanding about a type of addiction that isn't talked about very often but is very critical to understanding the addict. If you are looking into purchasing this book, then it's because you suspect there might be a friend or family member suffering from this disease/illness. The book gives you definitions, clarity, examples of real situations, possible causes, signs of the addiction, ways to help the addict or family members involved, and that there is hope for all involved. When you are living with an addict of this nature, you want to know that there is hope for change. This book helps you understand what you have to do to overcome this disease or help your friend or loved one overcome it. It lets you know you're not alone, that others share your pain and suffering, that this is a disease/illness, and that you can overcome this addiction. That is why I would recommend you read this book.

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Out of the Shadows

This book was recommended by our marriage counselor for my husband. He refused to read it.. but I did. Unfortunately, or fortunately.. we are now divorcing. This book helped me to see a pattern of behaviors that were presented by my husband. It offered a written understanding of his past and behaviors. He wasn't ready for/or is not capable of change for his own self. However, it allowed me an understanding and sense of worth that I knew I was not responsible for his actions. To delve into the psyche of another is empowering.

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For Those Who Think They Have A Problem

This is an excellent book on sex addiction. If you are uncertain where you stand you will know after you read the book. After you realize that you have been lieing to yourself and hiding it you will know. If your mate knows everything about you and is not troubled you are either ok or you both have problems. A good read.

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1. ISBN13: 9780062506047
2. Condition: NEW
3. Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.

Editorial Review :

A brilliant new guide to understanding the origins of codependence and the path to recovery by a nationally recognized authority on dependency and addiction.

In this fresh new look at codependence, Pia Mellody traces the origins of this illness back to childhood, describing a whole range of emotional, spiritual, intellectual, physical, and sexual abuses. Because of these earlier experiences, codependent adults often lack the skills necessary to lead mature lives and have satisfying relationships.

Recovery from codependence comes from clearing up the toxic feelings left over from childhood and learning to reparent oneself by intervening on the adult symptoms of codependence. Central to Mellody's concept is the idea of the "precious child" that needs healing within each adult. She creates a framework for identifying codependent behavior and describes an effective approach to recovery that includes both therapy and self-help processes. Designed to be used with her new workbook for codependents, Breaking Free, this is a powerful tool for understanding the nature of codependence.

Customer Review :

Good introduction to understanding potential issues in relationships

Although it sometimes feels like the book tries to set things into black and white, I'm sure many of us can see elements of what is discussed in present and past relationships. It was helpful to see an objective discussion of the dynamics experienced between love addicts and love avoiders. The one major disagreement I had with the book regarded the notion that it is healthy to have moments of being out of love - I may have missed the point, but it seems that the connection should always be there, no matter what the circumstances.

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Sound Advice

This book helped me admit to myself that I need to work harder at loving me. I am glad to have read this book

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Awesome book! I would absolutely recommend it!

Describes very well the patterns that show up in different families. It helped me tremendously to recognize the patterns in my family of origin and those that would show up in my own relationship. Talks about the "love addict" and on the other hand about the "love avoider" and the dynamics the two types create with each other. If you see that your love life is not working and has never really been working then get this book. It will help you in some way to see where you're at, what's missing to have your relationship work.

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An Addict all the same

Let's get serious. Love Addiction, Avoidance Addiction, Alcohol Addiction, Drug Addiction, Gambling Addiction, Food Addiction. Don't fool yourself, it's all the same. It's a painful compulsive behavior. It's a sickness and you'll need help. Pia Mellody does a great job of explaining the "disease" and laying out steps to overcome it. Take her advice. Do the work. I am a happier healthy person because I used her advice as one of my tools for healing.

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Absolutely Incredible

This book is so awesome I had to read it twice. There is so much information to digest that a second read was necessary. This book has been life changing for me.

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